Summer Missions Reflections

The Flowers Wilted and The Sunshine Turned to Rain

by Lori Ann Johnson - Team 2008

First, I had been at a loss for words since returning from Vietnam. It is pretty hard to render me speechless as most of you know but I have been a little out of sorts---my thoughts have been inward and have not made it to written form(I wanted to say paper but we don't do that anymore...I guess I could say cyberspace instead)

There was one day in particular that resonated the most since returning. We started our day on the bus to the clinic one early morning. We were all a bit sleepy that particular morning. One of the team members led a devotional while on the bus and the theme was do we ever question God or get angry with him for things that happen in our lives---? The leader of the devotional had experienced losses similar to mine regarding having children--this had brought about her to question God at one point. 

I reflected on my losses one of which was my daughter Madison being stillborn nine years ago. A year later Liam was born! Then at three months old he was diagnosed with craniosynostosis and had to have his entire skull restructured. All in all it took 11 years of losses to get Liam and then he was diagnosed with a rare cranial problem!--how could this be! I remembered having issues with being angry with God and questioning my faith. This was 8 years ago and all is well now ~~~ I did not speak during the devotional but I was deep in thought recalling those times...then we got off the bus and started our day.

The morning was a particularly beautiful one...the sun was shining brightly. I started getting my camera ready for the day and before I knew it a group of boys about my son's age appeared and gave me flowers(1st image)...I was delighted and put the bunches of bright beauty in the pocket of my scrubs. Before I knew it my pocket was full. 

Immediately following being showered with flowers, Viet(one of the team members) came up for a little chat and for some reason I felt compelled to mention the morning's devotional and before I knew it it led me to tell about my thoughts and the conversation ended with a description of Liam's cranial issues. I explained very briefly about craniosynostosis and how rare it was. The conversation was very brief and my friend said he had never heard of craniosynostosis. Then we went our separate ways because we had lots of work to do!

About then minutes later Viet came running out of one of the clinics and yelled, "Lori Ann there is a little boy with your son's condition in this room!" I hurried over and there was the sweetest little boy that had the same surgery but it was done too late and did not correct his issues. He was 5 years old and still the size of an infant and his mother held him limply in her arms. After asking permission, I held him and I cried~~~I don't easily cry but the tears flowed. With the help of interpreters they explained to the mother about my son--I hugged the mother and cried with her. There was nothing that could be done further for this little boy. So we prayed and I sponsored him. After awhile I left the room and ran ~~ I found Cheryl, our Chaplain for the trip, and she held me while I sobbed. My son, Liam. had medical care early for his condition and he is fine and doing what all children do at his age. I felt such sorrow for the little boy I had just held in my arms---I knew his life would never resemble my son's. 

I believe that God whispered in my ear that morning which led to the series of events. Something told me to tell Viet about that morning's devotional and my son. I may never have seen the little boy with all that transpires in a day's work at the clinics. 

Hours later I looked down at my pocketful of flowers and they were wilted and a few minutes later the sunshine turned to rain~~